Connection Before Correction

There are so many moments in dementia care when you know the answer.

You know what actually happened, you know what day it is, you know that their mother died years ago, you know they already ate lunch.

And because you know… it can feel natural to correct them.

But sometimes, being right and being helpful aren’t the same thing.

Especially when dementia has changed the way someone understands what is happening around them.

You may say… “No, that’s not what happened.”

And they become more certain.

You explain again.

And they become more upset.

Before long… you’re both trying to get back to the same reality.

But maybe that doesn’t have to be the goal.

Maybe the question becomes: What does this person need from me right now? Reassurance?

Safety? Comfort? To feel heard?

You can still guide.

You can still protect.

You can still help.

But you don’t always have to correct first. Sometimes, connection can become the bridge instead.

Because the goal isn’t to win the facts. It’s to stay in relationship with the person you love. 

And when connection comes first, the rest of the moment often becomes a little easier to navigate.